Apparently, my posting comments on domestic animals, shelter problems, etc. have hit a nerve...that being said, although others seem to cover this particular topic, I thought I would post this article about the court case involving the breeder/"hoarder" of dogs in Chester County. A "hoarder" is a collector of sorts, pets, in this reference. These people think they are helping, but actually aren't...

A special note to all the anonymous posters under my post http://www.phillyfuture.org/node/3156 - I get why you are posting anonymously, but if you have information about cruelty to animals ANYWHERE, you need to come forward. I noticed a comment that suggested contacting the reporters in the area who cover these stories. It is a great idea, and most will protect the confidentiality of their sources. But you must be credible, and they must be able to substantiate your information in some way.

From The Daily Local News:

Oxford kennel case ends; verdict to come next week
ANNE PICKERING, Staff Writer04/22/2006

"OXFORD -- The hearing in the animal cruelty case brought by the SPCA against three Lower Oxford residents concluded on Friday, but Magisterial District Judge Harry Farmer Jr. said he wouldn’t issue his ruling until next Friday, April 28.

It was the second day of testimony, in which more humane officers from the Chester County SPCA and Delaware County SPCA reported on the conditions they found at the kennel when it was raided Oct. 10.

The Chester County Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals confiscated 333 dogs, three cats and two birds that were living amid allegedly filthy conditions at a kennel operated by Michael Wolf.

Witnesses testified April 11 and on Friday of finding the animals living in cages and roaming at large in three buildings that were littered with feces and animal waste. Humane officers said that the odor from the kennel was so overwhelming that it was difficult to breathe.

Veterinarians who treated the dogs after they were removed testified that the dogs were afflicted with skin, ear, and eye conditions, and intestinal maladies as a result of living in the allegedly unsanitary conditions. Some dogs died after being removed. About 30 animals were taken to vets for emergency care the day of the raid.

Wolf has been charged with 337 counts of animal cruelty for unsanitary conditions, 200 citations for having unlicensed dogs and 100 citations for dogs without a current rabies vaccination. Wolf, who at one time owned and handled prize-winning show dogs, lost his kennel license in 2002.

Two other individuals, Gordon Trottier and Margaret Hills, who were also living in the three-building compound in the 1700 block of Baltimore Pike, were also charged with multiple counts of animal cruelty for alleged unsanitary conditions.

Wolf, Trottier and Hills were represented by three attorneys -- Eric Coates, Charles Iannuzzi and John Alice.

....If convicted of the animal cruelty charges, the defendants could be facing a fine of not less than $50 and or more than $750, imprisonment for no more than 90 days or both punishments on each count.

Assistant Chester County District Attorney Lori Finnegan asked Farmer to send Wolf and Trottier to jail.

"They need to go to jail.We need to send a message of incarceration, even if only one day for one dog or even one 90-day sentence," Finnegan said. "Each animal was at risk because of the filth they were living in," she said.

....If convicted, Wolf, Trottier and Hills would also be responsible for SPCA costs in relation to caring for the animals. A preliminary figure of $254,000 was provided to the judge, but SPCA officials said that not all the humane societies that were caring for the dogs had submitted their bills. "

To contact Anne Pickering, send an e-mail to apickering@dailylocal.com

Full text: http://www.dailylocal.com/site/news.cfm?newsid=16518311&BRD=1671&PAG=461&dept_id=17782&rfi=6

With many thanks to an anonymous poster and fellow poetry reader, I now have the text to the poem "Restatement of Romance" By Wallace Stevens. It is amazing to me that this poem was written in the 1936, because it speaks to me in 2006!

Restatement of Romance by Wallace Stevens

The night knows nothing of the chants of night.
It is what it is as I am what I am:
And in perceiving this I best perceive myself

And you. Only we two may interchange
Each in the other what each has to give.
Only we two are one, not you and night,

Nor night and I, but you and I, alone,
So much alone, so deeply by ourselves,
So far beyond the casual solitudes,

That night is only the background of our selves,
Supremely true each to its separate self,
In the pale light that each upon the other throws.

Link to helpful poster who gave me the poem:

http://www.phillyfuture.org/node/3196#comment-2630

Misc. Wallace Stevens stuff on the web:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wallace_Stevens

http://www.uvm.edu/%7Esgutman/Stevens.htm

http://www.web-books.com/classics/Poetry/Anthology/Stevens_W/index.htm

http://www.poemhunter.com/i/ebooks/pdf/wallace_stevens_2004_9.pdf

http://www.wallacestevens.com/

Yeah, that's the ticket. I have to get in good with that Curt Weldon to get a good job - that man sure do love to spread the love. Read all about it in the Philadelphia Daily News:

Mag: Weldon's kin works for firm that got copter contract

By BOB WARNER
warnerb@phillynews.com 215-854-5885

One of U.S. Rep. Curt Weldon's daughters has surfaced on the payroll of an Italian-owned helicopter company sharing a $1.6 billion contract to build a new chopper for the U.S. president.

The Web site of Harper's magazine reported yesterday that Weldon's daughter, Kim, has been working for AgustaWestland since last fall in a public-relations job. Her salary was not disclosed.

Weldon, a Republican who has represented Delaware County in Congress for 20 years, is a senior member of the House Armed Services Committee, with reportedly a strong influence on U. S. military procurement.

Harper's Washington editor, Ken Silverstein, who has been covering Weldon's activities for several years, reported on the new job for the congressman's daughter.

.....AgustaWestland is the helicopter-making subsidiary of the Italian firm Finmeccanica.

Another of Finmeccanica's subsidiaries, Oto Melara, has given a lobbying contract to Cecelia Grimes, a Media, Delaware County, woman who describes herself as one of Weldon's longtime family friends. (full text)

Preface: this is going to be a bit of a flowing stream of consciousness, so please indulge me.

When we are kids, we often feel invincible. It is in part, the age of innocence. Nothing touches us, we can prevail against anything and everything. We take risks; don’t appreciate a lot of things because we are young. We scoff at our elders, our parents, our teachers. If we are very, very lucky we reach adulthood somewhat unscathed.

As we age, life hits us. Often smack dab in the face. We see people age; experience death. Death of course brings us face to face with our own mortalities.

Death is a nasty life coach. Whether we see someone wither away and die from cancer, or die in a car accident, it’s cruel.

The grieving process is a varied and very individualized personal journey. No two people truly grieve alike. You go through the steps of shock, denial, anger, sadness, and acceptance. Just when you think you have a handle on your grief, you often get hit with another curve ball.

When people die it is human nature to reexamine ourselves. Where did we fall short? Where can we improve? We claw to hang onto our memories of the deceased. We do things like pore over a birthday card they might have sent us, or an e-mail. We save their messages on our answering machines and voice mail to keep their voices alive with us.

Eventually, you realize that this person you loved and lost is never truly gone, because they live on in your memories and hearts. Eventually you are able to accept this beautiful and simplistic gift that the dying leave behind for the living, and you realize the best way to honor that person is to life your own life to the best of your ability. You realize the fragility of life.

Am I trivializing this life process? Hardly. I am merely making sense of it all for myself.

But as I make sense and come to terms with someone’s death in my own life, I get a phone call that brings it all home once more, ripping the scab off the yet unhealed wound. That also is the fragility of life.

Last night, a friend from high school phoned me. This is a woman whom I didn’t know as well as I should have as a child, is someone, that as an adult,is very much a kindred spirit. She is bright, and funny and loving. But when she called me last night her voice was very, very small. And very, very sad. Hers was the voice of someone experiencing the fragility of life

My friend had just come back from a memorial service. A friend of hers had committed suicide. Suicide, the death of personal choice. An ending many seek; an ending that leaves many survivors at a horrible loss.

There was nothing I could really do for my friend except to listen. And yes, I could listen because once upon a time, someone I knew committed suicide, and I remember the rush of so many mixed emotions.

With a suicide there is much unresolved. You are hit with the cataclysmic effect of thoughts. Thoughts like:

“Why didn’t I see?”

“Why couldn’t I have helped?”

“What could I have done better for that person?”

“Why did they leave us?”

I remember being at the memorial service for this suicide and looking around at the crowd of mourners, and wondering who the heck all these people were and what they represented to that person in life, and where they fit in death? I saw people I knew that I knew didn’t know the deceased; they were there for the drama. The death hypocrites, I called them.

I remember feeling so very emotional, yet so damn detached that it frightened me. I remember the Genesis song “Follow you, Follow me” being played at the end. Here are the lyrics:

Stay with me,
My love I hope you’ll always be
Right here by my side if ever I need you
Oh my love

In your arms,
I feel so safe and so secure
Everyday is such a perfect day to spend
Alone with you

I will follow you will you follow me
All the days and nights that we know will be
I will stay with you will you stay with me
Just one single tear in each passing year

With the dark,
Oh I see so very clearly now
All my fears are drifting by me so slowly now
Fading away

I can say
The night is long but you are here
Close at hand, oh I’m better for the smile you give
And while I live

I will follow you will you follow me
All the days and nights that we know will be
I will stay with you will you stay with me
Just one single tear in each passing year there will be
I will follow you will you follow me
All the days and nights that we know will be
I will stay with you will you stay with me
Just one single tear in each passing year...

http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=555

I will never hear that song and not think of that day.

After the memorial service I remember trying to journal how I felt at the time, because I was just feeling so much. As the grief subsided, the anger arrived.

Anger at a suicide?

Yes.

Why?

Because I think suicide that reaches completion is a horribly selfish act. It leaves the living to pick up the pieces of the life of the deceased. It leaves you with so many unresolved issues, and creates a whole set of new ones – often questions without answers (the worst kind).

Suicide is also a cry for help. But if someone is found dead, that cry for help dies with that person. We can’t police every human being out there with tragic thoughts. Sad, and probably harsh, but true. And then there is the thought that there comes a point in our lives where we do have to stand on our own two feet and accept responsibility. And for every dark hour, if you believe, there IS a brighter day ahead.

This is what I shared with my friend. I don’t know if it was wrong or right, but when you experience something that makes you feel so alone, sometimes it helps to know that there are others that just get it.

But grief is an individual process; a windy road for which you may have support, yet must travel alone.

To my friend, if she is reading this, I say cry all you want, let the emotions out. But don’t blame yourself. Sometimes there are signs that a person will choose the path of suicide, but often there is not. And don’t feel guilty if you get angry that this person left you. It’s not so odd or unusual.

To my friend, if she is reading this, I say live your life and love it. Appreciate what you have. Embrace it, and the people around you. Healing will come in time. It is all part of the cycle of the fragility of life.

To my friend, if she is reading this, I say I care and I get it.

This article in the Daily News has caught my eye. A woman proffers information at the potential expense of her personal safety, calls the WRONG tipline number, and isn't eligible for a reward? What's up with the Scrooges at the Citizen Crime Commission Philly? Ok, she called the wrong number, but she stepped up to the plate where most won't and don't. Isn't that worth SOMETHING? Any takers?

From The Philadelphia Daily News:

Jill Porter | She ID's a serial killer, gets stiffed at reward time

"SHE LOST SLEEP, she fretted, she made a decision, and then changed her mind.

But finally she picked up the phone and did what city officials beseech us all to do: She stepped forward with information to help solve a crime.

Her nervous phone call to police led to the arrest of Juan Covington for last May's murder of Patricia McDermott.

The impact of the phone call was monumental: Covington turned out to be a serial killer whose crime rampage was discovered only after his arrest.

Last month, he pleaded guilty to three murders and two attempted murders. Two men who'd been jailed for crimes he committed were freed.

So I understand why the informant feels entitled to the $40,000 reward that was posted in the McDermott case. She and a coworker, who had the first hunch about Covington, plan to split it.

What I don't understand:

The Citizens Crime Commission refuses to give the cash to her - even though police acknowledge she solved the case.

Why? Because she called the police - not the crime commission - with the tip.

The commission apparently thinks the integrity of its "process" is more important than helping police solve crime.

The tipster called police after a SEPTA colleague - the operator who drove the bus Covington and McDermott were on the morning she was slain - told her a composite sketch of the killer looked like Covington.

They both knew Covington when he worked at SEPTA. (Both asked me for anonymity, out of fear of retaliation.)

Deciding to tell was traumatic.

"I was scared - really, really scared about this," she said. "I might have been accusing the wrong person."

Still, she made the call....."

full text: http://www.philly.com/mld/dailynews/news/local/14393529.htm

So I was reading my New York Times from Sunday. I hadn't gotten to the Style section and Weddings and Celebrations until last night (there was nothing on T.V. until 10 pm worth watching)

I was fascinated by one wedding announcement http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/16/fashion/weddings/16vows.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

because it referenced an American Poet I had forgotten about: Wallace Stevens.

The poem referenced in the announcement has piqued my curiousity. If any of you out there have it in a collection or anthology, could you post it?

I am looking for Wallace Stevens's "Restatement of Romance" - it would of been part of a group of poems her wrote in the 1930s. The premise is a couple maintaining separate identities even while together. I think it is so today, that even though it was written close to a century ago, it might make a good read...and if not too dark or sarcastic, I could use it in an upcoming wedding where I have to be the pithy bridesmaid...c'mon all you smarties....

Thanks!

I hope the Philadelphia Inquirer (www.philly.com/mld/inquirer/) reads this and is embarrassed. They should be.

A little background:

I decided to try home delivery of The Philadelphia Inquirer after never having it. Why? To show support for my hometown paper in a time of crisis (and here you people thought I only read Vogue, Allure, and Self). So I signed up for a "deal". Sundays only, since quite frankly, that is the only time I really have to read a paper cover to cover. But I thought hey, I’ll give it a whirl. Show some support (yeah like my teeny subscription would help, but anyway).

I haven’t been too thrilled with it because I thought the content and coverage would be better. It’s not (online really has enough). And then there is delivery.

Cookies and cocaine delivered right to your door courtesy of the City of Philadelphia? Apparently so...just out of curiousity, are city vehicles EVER used for city business, or just monkey business?

Dealer delivered cocaine with a city van
By Mitch Lipka
Inquirer Staff Writer
Excerpt:

"A major cocaine trafficker whose mode of delivery was a van from the Philadelphia managing director's office was sentenced yesterday to up to 14 years in prison.

Idris Enlow, 40, was convicted last month of possession of drugs with the intent to deliver and with conspiracy.

"The egregious use of a city vehicle while working for the city is beyond comprehension," Assistant District Attorney Brendan O'Malley said.

He had asked Common Pleas Court Judge Lillian H. Ransom for a stiffer sentence, but she imposed the mandatory minimum in the case of seven to 14 years. Enlow was acquitted of weapons charges.

However, Enlow, who has several past felony drug convictions and violated parole on a federal drug conviction, faces sentencing for the parole violation tomorrow.

More than $100,000 worth of narcotics was seized when Enlow was arrested in the city van in January 2004. Officers watched him for several days as he clocked in to work, picked up the van, and used it to get and deliver drugs."

Full text: http://www.philly.com/mld/inquirer/news/local/states/pennsylvania/counties/delaware_county/14373344.htm

It was suggested after I posted on Lois Murphy’s inordinate amount of press coverage (well she ISN’T a candidate yet), that I take a look at Mike Leibowitz, her challenger for the Democratic nod in the 6th district. As I have stated before, I don’t vote in the 6th district, but in the spirit of fair play, I am willing to give it a whirl (and I can whirl today because I am wearing the cutest peasant skirt!)

Let us begin class with WHO IS MIKE LEIBOWITZ AND WHY IS HE CHOOSING TO BE A POLITICAL MUTE WITH THE PRIMARY COMING UP? I have friends in the 6th district who didn’t even know they HAD another choice in the primary, which is but a heartbeat away!

Now here’s something to get REALLY depressed about and boy am I depressed...NYC’s former hero of 9/11 mayor, a man who WAS of the people was in Blue Bell, PA yesterday at a fire house. Sounds good, right? Rudy hangin’ with the firemen? OH NO it’s not. Why? Because tooty fruity rich and Rudy was stomping for non other than tricky Ricky, also know as (saw it up here) Senator Home Schoolin’.

Is that the ultimate desperate Republican dog and pony show or what? Trot out a hero to make a fool look good. Well, if Rudy Giuliani is going to be trotted out to make Santorum look good, who’s next? If this is the handwriting on the wall, it will be something I seriously consider before voting for Rudy Giuliani should he ever seek national office and he was on my ballot.

I’m sorry, but I can’t stand Santorum. And I can’t stand Casey. So let us hope that we have more to choose from than them come November….. and I also want to know if Giuliani is changing his tune – he used to be pro-choice among other things….is Rudy a political hypocrite? Any takers?

Giuliani Stumps For Santorum In Blue Bell
By: Jim McCaffrey, The Evening Bulletin Staff Reporter
04/19/2006

Blue Bell - Former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani urged Pennsylvania voters to return Rick Santorum to the Senate, saying his fellow Republican has used his leadership to protect the country against future terrorist attacks.

"He really has a comprehensive understanding of the dangers that are facing us," said Giuliani, a well-known moderate considering a run for president in 2008. "He understands the importance of police, the importance of law and order."

Giuliani spoke to about 150 supporters at a national security-themed event at the Centre Square Fire Company yesterday in Blue Bell, just outside Philadelphia.

Full text: http://www.theeveningbulletin.com/site/news.cfm?newsid=16500442&BRD=2737&PAG=461&dept_id=576361&rfi=6

Giuliani campaigns for Santorum
"He really has a comprehensive understanding of the dangers... facing us," the ex-N.Y. mayor said.
By Patrick Walters
Associated Press

Campaigning with Rick Santorum in Blue Bell yesterday, former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani urged Pennsylvania voters to return Santorum to the Senate, saying his fellow Republican had used his leadership to protect the country against terrorist attacks.
"He really has a comprehensive understanding of the dangers that are facing us," said Giuliani, who is considering a run for president in 2008. "He understands the importance of police, the importance of law and order."

Giuliani spoke to about 150 supporters at a national security-theme event at the Centre Square Fire Company in Blue Bell.

"The number-one concern of the federal government is national security," Santorum said. "It has to be."

....Giuliani has a long record of support for gay rights, gun control and legal abortion, and some of his views contrast starkly with those of the staunchly conservative Santorum. Santorum's campaign recently criticized Casey, who opposes abortion rights, for enlisting the help of "liberal friends" such as U.S. Sen. Hillary Clinton (D., N.Y.).

Full text: http://www.philly.com/mld/inquirer/news/local/14373256.htm

Time to get in your faces, and be controversial again (but, I am wearing REALLY cute spring sandals and have the most darling new clutch purse to soften the blow). The Duke University situation has provoked me to think, and to recall college days , stories I heard, and personal experiences.

What is the “Duke Situation”? Rape. Allegedly raping a stripper at a college house party.

And because she is a stripper, I am sure she is subject to all sorts of bad clichés – but what if she IS telling the truth?

Oops, they did it again! As in oops they went against their own procedures and murdered another family pet. Can this SPCA be sued? Can they be fined for cruelty to animals? While other shelters (like PACCA for example) are TRYING to clean up and do the right things, the Delaware County SPCA still demonstrates gross mismanagement. Strong words? Read this article and judge for yourself:

Shelter euthanizes a 2nd cat

Two months after the Delaware County SPCA shelter covered up the euthanasia of a beloved family cat and promised to change its policy, another cat has been put down before members of an Upper Darby family could claim their companion.

"I was just devastated," said Margaret Reynard, whose cat Keecha was euthanized after a 24-hour stay at the shelter. "I was just there an hour or two after she had been euthanized." ...

Full text

Ok, enough already. Are there ANY OTHER potential candidates for U.S. Congress this year? At all? Anywhere? Because knock me down, blow me over, I have had ENOUGH of Lois Murphy.

She is NOT the candidate YET

She is NOT the only candidate running for office

She is NOT that interesting

She still has hating Jim Gerlach as her MAIN campaign platform.

I do NOT have to vote for this woman, as I am not in her district thank the good lord in heaven above, but honestly, The Philadelphia Inquirer barely covers actual NEWS some days, yet this ONE reporter, Nancy Peterson, has covered Lois Murphy at least five times that I can find back from 2005 (my source? Lois's web site - she loves her press "Lois is Making Headlines" http://www.loismurphy.org/ )

Does anyone know why Lois is in the Inquirer so often for too much of an ado about nothing?

(If she loses the primary, I am going to add a laugh track to my blog if phillyfuture will let me - if she wins the primary but loses the election I am going to roll on up to Chester County and bring Jim Gerlach flowers personally- or maybe balloons - flowers are for girls - but I'll have to introduce myself first I suppose)

Murphy has raised $502,000 in 2006 for Gerlach challenge
She first has to win the Democratic nomination. Individuals have been the biggest donors.

By Nancy Petersen

Inquirer Staff Writer

Excerpt:
"Money, the mother's milk of politics, is flowing into Lois Murphy's campaign for Congress in the Sixth District.

Murphy, who is seeking the Democratic nomination to challenge Republican Jim Gerlach, raised $502,000 during the first three months of the year, bringing her total to $1.3 million for the 2005-06 election cycle.

Murphy released the data in advance of the federal filing deadline and quickly pointed to it as proof of her campaign's appeal.

The average contribution is less than $200, Murphy's spokesman, Mark Nevins, said, and 84 percent of the money has come from individuals, not political action committees.

"Lois couldn't be more pleased," Nevins said. "We interpret this as a mandate for change in the Sixth District."

The district includes towns in Chester, Montgomery and Berks Counties and a single precinct in Lehigh County.

Gerlach's campaign spokesman, John Gentzel, said that Gerlach's staff was still adding up the figures and that they would not be available until tomorrow, at the earliest.

The deadline for filing campaign-expense reports with the Federal Election Commission is Saturday.

Gerlach reported raising $1.4 million last year, according to information on the FEC Web site."

Full text: http://www.philly.com/mld/inquirer/news/local/14329238.htm

I have a simple question with this post: is Michael Nutter above reproach on everything politic? Or only with campaign funding reform? Is he in a total position to throw stones? Just askin...any takers?

Nutter sues his rivals over campaign funding
By Thomas Fitzgerald
Inquirer Staff Writer

City Councilman Michael Nutter might want to file this one under "no good deed goes unpunished."

Nutter yesterday sued four potential rivals in the 2007 race for mayor, demanding that they obey city campaign-contribution limits and immediately return a combined $967,753 to donors.

Nutter, who has adhered to the limits, acted one day after he was named among the defendants in a lawsuit by the government-watchdog Committee of Seventy that also seeks to enforce the law.

so i got this e-mail today, and cried i laughed so hard...y'all are SOOOOO SERIOUS TODAY, so here's a giggle :

Life is tough... it's tougher if you're stupid.

How do these people survive?

ONE: Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the r eply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

TWO: I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I s! aid to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE: A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

FOUR: I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you d! rive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

FIVE: Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

SIX: A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and should be fine, the mother says, I just gave him some ant killer..... Dispatcher: Rush him in to emergency!

Life is tough...
it's tougher if you're stupid.